So on the way to work this morning I cranked up John Mayer's live album Any Given Thursday. It's insane to hear the crowd on that recording. There are screams and yells at the start, but when Mayer takes the stage, the place goes ballistic. I tried to imagine what it would be like to have that kind of response just for appearing somewhere. I think I'd just get overwhelmed and confused and freeze up on stage. Hell, I lost concentration doing karaoke in Padre. Some people started laughing in the crowd and I for an instant forgot that they were just drunk because I wasn't used to hearing laughs when I sang.
I think I'm really starting to get addicted to performing. Every time I think about being on stage it starts to feel better and better now that I'm free from high school. Maybe something cool will happen in Austin.
I really wish I could play guitar and sing at the same time. Or maybe play piano and sing at the same time. That might work. I should try that.
I've decided that I have to lead an occupation where I have fans. I'm not doing the vain thing and saying I need to be famous. Even if it was just a small group like a bunch of coffee shop regulars liking me as a musician, or readers enjoying my writing. Fans give two things: appreciation and inspiration. Whenever you reach a stumbling block in your work, fans remind you that you're appreciated (something not everyone can say about their careers) and that you have a responsibility to keep those people happy. I had fans before, when I worked as a gaming writer. It was really cool to see the comments I'd get from people I had hardly talked to who were really affected by the latest article or the comments made behind my back on other sites. I guess that's what got me hooked. 