It's April, and for some strange reason that means it's campaign season here in Austin once more. Hot off the heels of the losses of November, Austin's population got right back into the mix like the hotbed of liberalism and dialogue that it is. First, the city's gone crazy for Kinky Friedman, since he's running for governor. If you're totally out of the loop on this one, pick up the latest Texas Monthly - he's the latest college student's political hero to dress in drag on the cover of a magazine, in the tradition I suspect Jon Stewart started. In short, he's a popular Texas-flavored writer and musician, and he's not disappointing fans seeking a Texas-flavored politician. Even though one of his supposed ideas is to build The Great Wall of Mexico, I still support him for 3 big reasons.1. The Great Wall will never happen - way too much of an economic interest in Mexican labor.
2. Campaign slogans. With "Kinky in 2006: Why the Hell Not?" and "No teacher, librarian or lesbian left behind," this guy's got a great approach to grab voters' attention. And it's working - national news media is giving the guy great coverage.
3. He's a Plan II graduate, class of 1956. Not only must I show love to one of the more important institutions of my life, but I would near-blindly trust *any* P2 graduate to run my government. The only generalized group of people I'd choose over P2 to rule my world would be Rhodes Scholars, only because of their good track record in recent years - Bill Clinton and Wesley Clark could probably save the world all by themselves.Then we step down a level, to city council elections. It's nice that we have about as many people running as there were Democratic presidential candidates, but it also makes the process a tad inconvenient. I have yet to read up on any of the candidates or actually go vote, and I should probably do that, well, damn soon. And then it hits the level of downright annoyance: student elections. After seeing two years of college student elections, I honestly believe they should be banned and any important positions should be appointed by adults in charge of various offices. It was bad enough during student government elections. Everyone handed out t-shirts like humans needed them to breathe, and at the same time if you had friends working on a campaign, they needed your promised vote for sustenance. Drove me fucking insane. So what's the perfect thing to do after the SG insanity dies down? Start Plan II student elections! Now all my closest friends come bugging me every day, asking if I've seen their flyers, if the advertisement was effective, if I know who keeps taking down the flyers every night, and it goes on, and on, and on.So stop it. I'm your friend and I know you're running, yes, but please be aware that I have multiple friends and that includes your opponent. Take that into consideration, let me choose you for your merits and leave me the hell alone!But Kinky, you can come chill at my place any damn day, OK?
2. Campaign slogans. With "Kinky in 2006: Why the Hell Not?" and "No teacher, librarian or lesbian left behind," this guy's got a great approach to grab voters' attention. And it's working - national news media is giving the guy great coverage.
3. He's a Plan II graduate, class of 1956. Not only must I show love to one of the more important institutions of my life, but I would near-blindly trust *any* P2 graduate to run my government. The only generalized group of people I'd choose over P2 to rule my world would be Rhodes Scholars, only because of their good track record in recent years - Bill Clinton and Wesley Clark could probably save the world all by themselves.Then we step down a level, to city council elections. It's nice that we have about as many people running as there were Democratic presidential candidates, but it also makes the process a tad inconvenient. I have yet to read up on any of the candidates or actually go vote, and I should probably do that, well, damn soon. And then it hits the level of downright annoyance: student elections. After seeing two years of college student elections, I honestly believe they should be banned and any important positions should be appointed by adults in charge of various offices. It was bad enough during student government elections. Everyone handed out t-shirts like humans needed them to breathe, and at the same time if you had friends working on a campaign, they needed your promised vote for sustenance. Drove me fucking insane. So what's the perfect thing to do after the SG insanity dies down? Start Plan II student elections! Now all my closest friends come bugging me every day, asking if I've seen their flyers, if the advertisement was effective, if I know who keeps taking down the flyers every night, and it goes on, and on, and on.So stop it. I'm your friend and I know you're running, yes, but please be aware that I have multiple friends and that includes your opponent. Take that into consideration, let me choose you for your merits and leave me the hell alone!But Kinky, you can come chill at my place any damn day, OK?