Go back home again

Wow, what a fall it's been. In the last two months I moved from Tokyo to Texas, to San Francisco, back to Texas. This has thrown a lot of things into relief. I've had enough time to stew on what happened and its consequences.

Getting an offer to go to San Francisco was achieving a dream I had two years prior, at the end of grad school. The vision had been to move to Silicon Valley, join the internet business, do interesting things, and enjoy the wonderful quality of life that the area has to offer.

The timing couldn't have been better. I had just been priced out of Tokyo. Compared to my early days of working in the city, the yen weakened by roughly 30%. Here's a graph showing the relative power of the yen during the time:

https://www.google.com/finance?chdnp=1&chdd=0&chds=0&chdv=1&chvs=Linear&chdeh=0&chfdeh=0&chdet=1385317404457&chddm=596379&q=CURRENCY:JPYUSD&ntsp=0&ei=CESSUtDhOKXRsgfyTA

This is bad when you hold staggering debt in dollars. Student loans become 30% harder to pay, relentlessly, every month.

I was already tired of life in Japan. My job's biggest challenge was to my patience. Friends were good, but I missed my oldest and best friends, and the main activity was heavy drinking. My liver was tired, too. As much as I adore sushi, my palate craved breakfast tacos. And I was also growing disinterested in Tokyo's dating scene - figures that I'd meet someone special at exactly that time.

Looming bankruptcy, or a fiscal bailout from family, or a grossly irresponsible lengthening of the terms of payment, was the final push out of Tokyo. 

My first month home was intense. After a couple weeks adjusting from jet lag, I packed my possessions in the GTI and set a course for SF. 

I spent a week in SF. It was great to be among old friends, but I had been ambushed. Based on previous experience in California, I knew SF wouldn't be cheap. But since I had last lived in the state, San Francisco had inflated itself wildly. I just received this direct comparison this morning:

Consumer Prices Including Rent in Tokyo are 15.53% lower than in San Francisco, CA
Rent Prices in Tokyo are 48.46% lower than in San Francisco, CA
Restaurant Prices in Tokyo are 20.03% lower than in San Francisco, CA
My options had effectively become to string myself along, paycheck-to-paycheck, commuting 90 minutes each way, all for the sake of Living in California; or return home, be nearer to more friends and family, start building financial assets, and spend time working on Musivu. 

As I woke up in a beautiful San Francisco apartment that wasn't mine, poorly slept, seemingly physically incapable of going to the office, the decision was a no-brainer.

I've come back home again. At 29, I'm relieved that I'm still able to. The special someone, who even prior to meeting me had her heart set on living in San Francisco, is willing to give Texas a shot. I'm still processing what I think of life here, away from Tokyo, having walked away from an interesting career in data. 

If in name only, I accomplished dreams from a prior chapter of life. I'm sure that walking away from all that will have consequences that play out for years to come. It's time to reassess and think about the next set of dreams.

Playlist: Random Access Memories

I've been trying for six months to describe how I feel about Daft Punk's Random Access Memories. I've finally worked it out.

It's just a twist on this joke about bottled water:

(skip to 1:00)

"How dumb do I think the Americans are? I bet you we could sell those idiots music from the 1970s."

"Pierre, the Americans are pretty dumb, but they're not going to buy 70s music."

"Oh ho ho, yes they are! Let's just tell the Americans the music is Daft Punk."

E3 2013 (Or, Civil War)

Civil war is the ultimate process of transition. Whatever social or legal fabric held a state together collapses, and battle will assuredly be the only way to decide the new order. 

The whole thing is ugly. Leaving the previous order is unpleasant. Conflict is hell. And by the obvious analog to the Arab Spring, we've seen that the new order is every bit untenable at its birth as the old one was at its demise.

And yet it's vital. In human society as with games, conflict is the ruthlessly efficient process by which the old is turned over and the new is released. 

Welcome to gaming in 2013. Everywhere you go, there's conflict. 

Investor Relations vs Consumer Marketing

The last 3 or so years marked 'crappy' E3s where extremely little of value was shown. Press conferences steered toward speaking to an investor audience rather than toward gamers. That ties in to the rest of the reasons below, but let's get to the good part first:

This year, for the first time in a long time, felt like Christmas morning once again. You could see real games - lots of them - that looked downright great. Tons of tickets for the Hype Train were bought. In all corners of the Internet, Fry from Futurama demanded that game companies shut up and take his money. 

Microsoft opened things up with a breath of fresh air that just shut the hell up about their system and its restrictions and offered reasons to actually buy the thing. Gamers were happy. When you kick things off with Metal Gear Solid 5, people tend to sit up and listen. And then you tell them that the game has facial motion capture and Snake is now played by Kiefer Sutherland of 24 fame, people's heads explode. Predictably, MS made obligatory mentions of new games from their first-party stable; namely Halo 5 and Forza Motorsport 5. Then there was Titanfall, and that one's one to watch. Alumni of the early Call of Duty series - ya know, the really good ones that made it the franchise it is - left, started their own studio, and built a fast-paced, arcade-y shooter where humans and mechs fight on the same battlefield. 

Then Sony came and blew the place up with a cornucopia of games. They even had 8 indie games on stage at the same time at one point. The whole thing was unreal. 2 straight hours of "But wait, there's more!" and every time, the "more!" was new games.

It's not that Sony's platform necessarily has a ton of better games. If you strip away the multi-platform titles, you're left with Microsoft's shooter and racing sim against Sony's shooter, racing sim, and handful of (good but ultimately forgettable) action games. But by showing games for two hours, Sony's marketing people proved that they Get It, and Sony has the privilege of being associated with last year's best of show Watch_Dogs in addition to Kingdom Hearts III, Final Fantasy XV, The Witness, TransistorThe Elder Scrolls Online, aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaand:

Destiny. Bungie's new one. Shooter MMO. Must-watch. 

PC vs Console

A writer wiser than me once noted that there's a perpetual ebb and flow between heydays of PC gaming and consoles. Going back to 1990 or so, consoles peak halfway through their cycles: 2-3 years in old cycles, more like 4 years in the most recent generation. As consoles get long in the tooth, the PC starts to look like the "enlightened" platform once more with newer high-end GPUs and some real artistic creativity.

Amazingly, we're still not above asking the "Is <platform out of vogue> dead?" question like clockwork. Through the 2009-2012 dark years marked by Facebook and mobile games (see below), we declared Consoles to be Dead many times over, "finally" made obsolete by the iPhone and iPad. 

This E3 brought almost all console games from publishers, despite the quietly thriving PC industry making a killing from Steam, the Humble Indie Bundle, and League of Legends

Real Games vs Mobile and Social

For roughly the last year, Zynga has been worth less than the sum of its computers, servers, real estate and furniture. Think about that implication: the people inside the building actively detract from the value of the legal entity that remains.

The mobile/social wave has been ridden. There will still be an occasional hit casual game, just like the US now has Candy Crush Saga and Japan has Puzzles & Dragons, but the mainstream press will never publish a frank article saying that an app maker like Rovio has published their one-hit wonder app (even though they have).

Pac-Man fever happened in the 80s, and while Namco has never had a payday on that level ever since, it's gotten by by making good games. In ten years' time, what remains of Vh-1 will make programming asking "Hey, remember Angry Birds?"

In the last year we've seen a handful of AAA games get ported to iOS. Going forward, we may see some great indie creativity on this platform given the sheer market size and free availability of tools and access to the App Store. 

Indies aside, though, surprise surprise - the gaming muggle press wrongfully predicted the demise of AAA gaming. Actually, that's an amazing analogy: the world's gaming muggles will be "sooooo addicted" to Candy Crush Saga or some other flavor of the moment, but the wizards - with their real magic - are alive and well.

Gamers vs Themselves

5 years ago, the Internet hated GameStop because gamers listened to complaints from publishers, ostensibly representing developers: used game sales siphon money away from the creative side and put it all in the pockets of a retailer.

Tables have turned: gamers now voraciously want value - or at least the status quo. Every E3 is marked by a singular moment or utterance, usually from an exec during a press conference. Over recent years it's been bad: "My body is ready." Mr. Caffeine. A strange backlash to the curiously good casting call of Aisha Tyler for a publisher presser. 

This year's moment, without question, is the unbelievably riotous applause to Sony's announcement that the PlayStation 4 will retrench it self in its current disc-based model, shunning the complicated rights management rules Microsoft tried to adopt.

(I quietly wonder whether GameStop has taken to reputation management - that is, paying Reddit commenters to lean toward used games wherever possible.)

Discs vs Businesses of the Future

Gamers' roar at Sony's shamelessly old-school approach was so loud that it made Microsoft reverse course. 

MS was on the verge of being the first firm to allow digital resale - something gamers have whinged about for years - but gamers' immediate fear of loss pressed harder. MS, to its credit, said "OK guys, we listened" and backed off. 

Still, a few smart bloggers out there noticed that MS was trying - if imperfectly - to create an ownership system that would make sense seven years from now. 

Right now, the gamers are still right. The world is unfortunately not ready for a full-on digital lifestyle, and when it is we shouldn't allow Microsoft to tell us how that lifestyle should be lived when they design it by committee. 

Microsoft vs Sony

[Microsoft have] never been able to explain themselves, and part of it is an engineer culture that doesn’t (marketing term incoming) “face” consumers and, I would suspect, resents being made to explain why something which is so manifestly efficient and purposeful would need to be.  Contrast this with Sony, which is almost completely a brand exercise and for whom the tone and texture of a message is the primary product.
Penny Arcade

To comment on press conferences - really, artfully crafted demos - is more to comment on their marketing outsourcers than it is the actual systems or games themselves. 

In a sense, little has changed since the 90s. Sony brought the PlayStation into the world after being backstabbed by Nintendo. The brand, the company, and the box are born from the gaming world. Microsoft, however, has wanted a nebulous "set-top box" since the 90s. Bill Gates even wrote about it in The Road Ahead - the pre-internet hardcover version. A game console was a hypothesis on that quest, and the pre-reversal Xbox One was the clearest indication we've had yet that the quest remains unchanged. The system's focus is very nearly anything but games: Kinect, voice commands, media delivery, cable TV, rights-managed, Xbox Live subscriptions, all the labels signed on, and oh yeah I guess there's Halo (right guys? We have a Halo back there in the back, right?). 

Microsoft's vision is potentially dazzling in the same way the iPhone was - holy crap, we have the Internet in our pockets now! - the possibilities for putting the Internet in our TVs are nearly as amazing. But when Microsoft lays out the details - the cable TV subscriptions, the logins, the rights management, the Xbox Live subscription plans, the labels being signed on - it's daunting.

Nintendo vs conventional wisdom

Nintendo always leaves us guessing. Let's not forget that they blew up that whole motion control thing in the first place. 

This year, they brought more confusion. Wait, you're not holding a traditional E3 stage press conference, but you are holding a massive conference on YouTube? And you're bringing a ton of games but they're all slated for 2014? Even the ones that would seal the deal for any Nintendo E3, like Mario Kart 8 with zero gravity or Super Mario 3D World or a new Yoshi's Island or a new Super Smash Bros. or Pikmin 3?

And after the show Miyamoto-san let slip that they're going to take a quick stab at the free-to-play business model. This is the same company that led the anti-social-game charge in the early Dark Ages, say around 2010. Iwata-san used his keynote speeches to say that those free-to-play things are not games, these are, and they're worth the $39 rather than the $1 you paid Apple or Facebook.

The old adage stands true: don't bet against Nintendo.

Developer-curated vs user-created

Sandbox titles made some pretty big appearances. Just a couple years ago, LittleBigPlanet was as wide as the sandbox got. Now, Project Spark seems to be the full-featured evolution of Microsoft's Kodu, and according to the press the variety is truly unbelievable. Every platform will be host to Disney Infinity, a family-friendly sandbox with gaming's hottest revenue model grafted on (and that's not free-to-play - it's actually Activision's Skylanders, which is a game aimed at a young audience where characters are unlocked by the physical purchase of action figures).

The number of titles at the opposite end of the spectrum - fully directed by a developer, with no user-generated content input - has dwindled rapidly. The most obvious titles are GTA V, which will stay true to the series, and similar $100m budget titles like Metal Gear Solid V . Nintendo, naturally, will stay out of this world and continue to do its thing, but even they are showing a little agility in response to user feedback. This year, their presser went fully online-only and they promoted bumping up the release of a Wii U art title (think a new, less whimsical Mario Paint) to support users who have been using the U's tablet to draw very fancy pictures. 

But the important shift here has been for many big publishers to move toward the middle of the spectrum and embrace games as a service. EA's most-publicized titles, like a new Need for Speed and a new Battlefield, are moving more toward being online-centric in their gameplay, and will doubtlessly experiment with their revenue models. Ubisoft's big hit of this show was The Division, an Enemy of the State-esque action MMO that looks positively Hot, and Activision brought a preview for Destiny, an MMOFPS from Bungie. The online nature of these titles means that stories told by players will be as unique as snowflakes. Conversations won't begin with "OMG, remember that part where..?" but rather "OMG, this one time I was in..." 

Further boosting that:

Multiplayer vs omniplayer

Multiplayer will cease to be a relevant word. I propose "omniplayer" to replace it. This means a style of game where players log in to a persistent world but friends are brought together inside the game universe to play together.

Think of it this way: Halo multiplayer is signing in, forming a lobby with a discrete group of friends, playing one round of a game, returning to the lobby, and repeating that process. The line looks like this: |---|---|---|---| where the vertical bars represent matches and you can draw a line between discrete points in time where you're actually playing the game.

But nobody buys a $60 game for the menus.

Omniplayer more seamlessly weaves between multiplayer 'rounds,' and we're seeing this first in racing games like the new Need for Speed and MMO shooters like Destiny. So the little line I drew above now looks more like a double helix. I'm playing, and you're playing, and then we converge for a certain in-game event, and then diverge again after the event. 

A big, tasty conflict

So we have a war with nine discrete points of conflict. Each one of these things is a transition of its own: consumers over investors, consoles are back, Real Games are back, gamers' voices have changed, digital distribution has stumbled, the Console Wars continue, Nintendo abides like The Dude, players will craft their own stories, and worlds will become more engaging as we seemingly naturally encounter our friends in them.

But I regret kicking off with that metaphor. In the real world, war, conflict and transition are hideously destructive, and all people involved inevitably lose on a personal level.

In gaming, however, conflict and transition are amazing things. They're the times when creators start taking risks. Gamers who love creativity and imagination uniformly win.

We have before us a veritable cornucopia of potential awesome. If you haven't been clicking links to games in this post, go back and do so - every link is to an in-game demo or official trailer. And they're all impressive. Every single one. 

It is, without doubt, a great time to be a gamer.

Meeting one's heroes

"Don't meet your heroes," they say. 

1. Your heroes will not be who you think.

My favorite case of this is when Richard Hammond met Evel Knievel, the jumping-over-things-on-motorcycles daredevil, in the senile twilight of his life. There may be no sterner warning on film.

2. Post Olympic Depression Disorder.

Likewise, living your dreams can be a dangerous thing. Gold medal winners are watched for depression after they've met their singular life goal. What next? 

Worse still is when the living of your dream is taken away from you. I've wanted to mention for months now that one of my favorite game designers, Warren Spector, had his dream of working for Disney ripped away from him after his Disney game wasn't a runaway hit. Spector has been a well-documented Disney freak his whole life. He was admittedly euphoric when the Mickey Mouse House bought his game studio and brought him into the fold. It must be devastating to be kicked back out of it. He's been silent in the press and on his blog since the studio closed early in 2013. I hope he's OK, and I hope he's working on something awesome.

I've said all of this to say that living in Japan has been something of a smaller version of that.

I didn't know it when I was younger, but I think at some point Japan became The Big Hairy Audacious Goal. I knew I wanted to learn everything there was to know about games, and Japan made all the games, so I needed to know the language to find my way around the world of games over there.

As high school progressed into college, teaching in Japan, grad school and going back to Tokyo, it's become apparent that I achieved the Big Hairy Audacious Goal. I live and work in the city, I speak the language, I can move about somewhat smoothly, and I've even owned a Japanese market game console or two. 

But times have changed. 

In the last 15-20 years, the center of gravity of the gaming world has shifted west. Japanese to English localizations that used to take months or years now take days. And Japan no longer has a lock on what made its games so great. Your heroes will not be who you think.

Moreso outside of gaming, times have changed. Quoth Spike Japan, one of the more interesting Japan blogs, upon that writer's retirement:

I’m bored, to be honest, with Japan, the Japan of Abenomics and AKB47 [sic], of The Idolmaster and super-deformed anime, of bullying and territorial tantrums and constitutional revisionism. 

I wrote in 2008 that I had lived the dream. There are taller mountains to climb - maybe Dragon Quest VII or Yakuza 5 in the original Japanese - but I lack the language skill or the interest in the game itself. I live in the Japan of Monster Hunter 3, Monster Hunter 3G, Dragon Quest, and microtransaction-driven collectible card games made for Android.

What now? Post-Olympic Depression Disorder.

That's not to say I'm depressed. 2013 has been very good to me. But I've climbed my mountains and, as far as Japan is concerned, wish to climb no more.

I spent much of 2012 being bothered by the "What now?" question. I'm no longer in a huge rush to get back Stateside - just a minor rush, say, in the next 2 years or so. So until it's time to make that move, I'm going to slow down a bit and enjoy Tokyo. More networking, more parties, and more gaming - probably in English. 

On keeping blogging

Where in the world have I been?

Two simple answers:

Too busy to really write
I've had it in my mind since grad school that for me to write well takes a very clear mind, which usually implies that I have enough free time to decompress from whatever it is I'm doing, deeply think through the things I've been wanting to say, and actually compose/edit it in a way that doesn't suck to read.

The result of me not doing this is just kind of vomiting onto digital ink whatever's running through my mind, like a year-plus's worth of music, movies and games without any real flow (and leaving out a lot of things that had been really good).

When I do have time to think more deeply, it results in the stuff I'm more proud of like Based on a truthy story or my review of the Legend of Zelda symphony.

Rather than keep verbally vomiting, I've saved drafts with notes of inspiration, hoping to come back to them later. 

Waiting for the (blog) world to change
The shutdown of Posterous really pissed me off. I had finally been burned by that Y Combinator-following, venture capital-fueled bubble in which good ideas are shown to the world (in MVP form) and then inevitably shut down as the engineers (not the ideas) are acquired by Facebook, Apple, Twitter, Google or maybe Microsoft. I'm not quick to endorse a product or service to non-technical friends and family, but much of my family was pretty well set using Posterous and so was I. New project? Spin up a Posterous blog for it. My brother wants a Web presence for his music composition work? Posterous. I need to share a ton of photos or YouTube embeds in my blogging? Posterous nails it again.

I even met Garry in real life once. He was cool.

Realizing the unhappiness of users who were properly pissed at Posterous' closing, Garry and Co. launched a clone service, Posthaven, and said "OK guys, we're not selling out this time. We promise. That'll be $5 a month, please. Oh, and it's still in beta."

That works for Silicon Valley. Not so much for writers who want posting by email and attachments and YouTube embeds just handled, and can't have those features back yet because it's still in beta, but can pay $5 a month.

So the rational actor in me is torn: do I stick with Garry and Co and give them $5 a month for a blog service that will certainly become good? Or do I give $8 a month to Squarespace because they're a website business and support all devices pretty amazingly well and connect to pretty much every web service I could ever want?

I still can't really decide on which to use. I have lots of pictures and thoughts to share with you, though. I promise.